AIGHT. Im more of a bad news first type of person... so here it goes. My beautiful wife is gone, and I won't see her again until Nov. 12th. I am sad. Also, our dog Buster is sad. My wife took the camera, so I have no way showing just how sad my canine friend really is.

THE GOOD NEWS. I'm drunk. I went to the LHBS before I got drunk, bought 2 batches worth of grain, and I'm not going to sleep until the Mack And Jack's clone (number 2) is finished. i don't care if its 11 O'clock,  I'm NOT hitting the hay until its done.

Yes, this is my serious face.

I bought shitty whiskey and Red Hook ESB. The ESB is for taste, the shitty whiskey  is to keep the buzz going and to escalate my drunkenness. I will be updating this with problems as I go along.

1. NO  PROBLEMS!!! Mash is done. Preboil gravity reading with my brand spanking new hydrometer is right on target.

2. ME BLOGGING AND DRINKING WHILE BREWING. I don't know how long this has been boiling... but its been raging for a while now. Also, I think I'm gonna hop the shit out of it. Who knows, it could be better than Mack And Jacks. It could also be much, much worse.


4. I DONT KNOW WHATS GOING ON IN 30 ROCK. Jenna is dead but sheees not... or something. I need more whiskey.

5. Everything went fine, until I BROKE ANOTHER HYDROMETER. I don't really care. The wort is in the closet, bubbling away after less than an hour. So..

SUCCESS. I just brewed drunk. Was fun. Maybe I messed it up, maybe not. All I know is that I passed the time and it was fun.


Yesterday when I was making the dunkelweisen, I was getting all my crap ready to put the wort into my primary and I dropped my hydrometer. It shattered all over the ground.

 Frickin bummer, I don't know what the starting gravity of my beer was :(

O well, i guess this means I get to make one last trip to the brew shop before I head off for tour on Saturday. There's always a silver lining... maybe Ill even brew one last batch since I'm going there anyways!

One last note... don't try tasting your beer when its fermenting like crazy. I stuck a straw into my MNJ clone to get a taste today and basically got a tiny bit of beer along with a mouthful of krausen. Gross... I need to stop doing that.


Today I woke up at 9:30 and immediately started brewing my dunkelweisen! Awesome way to wake up, except I forgot about the coffee part of my morning routine and I am getting a headache. Anyway, while that is happily mashing away at 154 degrees

I thought I would post the recipes for this beer and the MNJ clone I did last night.


Recipe Specifications
Batch Size: 1.25 gal     
Boil Size: 1.43 gal
Estimated OG: 1.056 SG
Estimated Color: 14.7 SRM
Estimated IBU: 17.9 IBU
Brewhouse Efficiency: 75.00 %
Boil Time: 60 Minutes

Amount        Item                                                            Type         % or IBU     
1 lbs 9.6 oz  Wheat, Flaked (1.6 SRM)                           Grain        60.61 %      
8.0 oz        Munich Malt (9.0 SRM)                                Grain        18.94 %      
4.0 oz        Vienna Malt (3.5 SRM)                                 Grain        9.47 %       
2.7 oz        Caramel Wheat Malt (46.0 SRM)                  Grain        6.44 %       
1.9 oz        Caramel/Crystal Malt -120L (160.0 SRM)    Grain        4.55 %       
0.30 oz       Liberty [4.30 %]  (60 min)                            Hops         17.9 IBU     

Mash Schedule: Temperature Mash, 2 Step, Medium Body
Total Grain Weight: 2.64 lb
Temperature Mash, 2 Step, Medium Body
Step Time     Name               Description                         Step Temp    
30 min        Protein Rest       Add 3.30 qt of water at 129.3 F     122.0 F      
45 min        Saccharification   Heat to 154.0 F over 15 min         154.0 F      
10 min        Mash Out           Heat to 168.0 F over 10 min         168.0 F      

Mack And Jacks Clone

Recipe Specifications
Batch Size: 1.25 gal     
Boil Size: 1.43 gal
Estimated OG: 1.059 SG
Estimated Color: 13.6 SRM
Estimated IBU: 46.9 IBU
Brewhouse Efficiency: 75.00 %
Boil Time: 60 Minutes

Amount        Item                                                          Type         % or IBU     
2 lbs 4.0 oz  Pale Malt (2 Row) UK (3.0 SRM)            Grain        81.52 %      
4.0 oz        Caramunich Malt (56.0 SRM)                     Grain        9.06 %       
2.1 oz        Cara-Pils/Dextrine (2.0 SRM)                     Grain        4.71 %       
2.1 oz        Caramel/Crystal Malt - 80L (80.0 SRM)     Grain        4.71 %       
0.10 oz       Cascade [5.50 %]  (Dry Hop 3 days)         Hops          -           
0.35 oz       Centennial [9.70 %]  (60 min)                     Hops         46.2 IBU     
0.10 oz       Cascade [5.50 %]  (2 min)                         Hops         0.6 IBU      
0.19 oz       Orange Peel, Sweet (Boil 5.0 min)              Misc                      

Mash Schedule: Temperature Mash, 1 Step, Medium Body
Total Grain Weight: 2.76 lb
Temperature Mash, 1 Step, Medium Body
Step Time     Name               Description                         Step Temp    
60 min        Saccharification   Add 3.45 qt of water at 165.9 F     154.0 F      
10 min        Mash Out           Heat to 168.0 F over 10 min         168.0 F      

I have yet to taste these obviously, but they should be awesome like every other beer I make. Besides that brown ale... that damn brown ale...

Busy Day for Brewing!

Today I went to the brew store (Stomp Them Grapes in Denver), and after an HOUR AND A HALF I finally left with two fresh bags of grain, a Mac And Jack's African Amber clone and a dunkelweisen. I made the clone today...

Hope in a bottle.
...hopefully after all that mashing and sparging and boiling and hopping and funneling and yeasting and shaking, it will somewhat resemble the awesome beer I can only get when I visit my bro in Seattle.

After I finished that up, I went ahead and bottled my last cider. Its pretty tasty, but honestly I would have rather made another beer.

Tomorrow its the dunkelweisen's turn.
Those grains don't even know what they are in for...
I had never heard of this style of beer before, and I am pretty pumped on it. Its basically a dark wheat beer. Never had one before... but I love experimenting!

Just Spent A Few Hours In Beersmith

Tweeking a Mac and Jack's clone for my system and creating a dunkelweisen recipe. Gonna brew them tomorrow and Wednesday. PUMPED!!! Also, I have come to the conclusion that there are far too many yeast strains in the world. I wonder if there is anyone that has actually tried ALL of them. I would like to shake that persons hand, and then ask him/her if they think it is really neccessary that we have that many in the first place.

I suspect the answer would be  "no," but then again I'm a noob so what the hell do I know. Anyway, updates from the kitchen tomorrow.

Success and Failure

So I checked on the yeast I washed and harvested from my hefeweizen... and it worked!

The white stuff on the bottom is the yeast. What does this mean? I don't have to  pay for yeast when I brew my next hefeweizen batch! Hurrah!

So after I concluded that my yeast washing attempts had been succsessful, I was gonna post a guide on how to wash yeast... then I fricked it up royally. I didn't sanitize the jars >.< Anyway,  next time I'll do it right... I hope.

how to bottle beer

Looking to learn how to bottle beer? Well do I have good news for you... I know how and have nothing better to do then sit here and write about it!

Last night I bottled my hefeweizen and oatmeal stout, and took a bunch of pictures in the process. Its a fairly simple procedure, but can be messy, especially if you try doing it yourself. Its also important to remember that after your beer is done fermenting, you want to expose it to oxygen as little as possible. Oxygenating beer after it has fermented can lead to off flavors (AKA shitty tasting beer), so you want to make sure everything is in order before you crack open your jug.

So the first things first! Here is a list of stuff you will need to bottle.

Dear Ryan: This is for you

Hey man! Remember when we were texting a few minutes ago and you wanted my American IPA recipe? Here it is!

3 lbs Pale Malt (2 Row) US (2.0 SRM) Grain 85.71 %
8.0 oz Caramel/Crystal Malt - 40L (40.0 SRM) Grain 14.29 %
0.30 oz Chinook [11.65 %] (60 min) Hops 41.7 IBU
0.10 oz Chinook [11.65 %] (30 min) Hops 10.7 IBU
0.20 oz Cascade [5.00 %] (15 min) Hops 5.9 IBU
0.30 oz Cascade [5.00 %] (5 min) Hops 3.6 IBU
0.10 oz Cascade [5.00 %] (2 min) Hops 0.5 IBU
0.10 oz Chinook [11.65 %] (1 min) Hops 0.6 IBU
1 Pkgs Fermentis 05 Yeast

MAKE SURE THAT THE ALPHA PERCENTAGES ON YOUR HOPS MATCH MINE. If they don't, I can send you an updated recipe to mesh with the hops you bought :)

Mash at 154 for an hour. Mash out, sparge and shit as usual. The last 2 hop additions were STEEPED together for about 1.5 minutes in a tea... thing. Make sure not to leave them in when you cool the wort.

Just tasted mine, and holy crap its awesome. I hope its done when I get back from tour!

Late night experiments

I found some very HARD ciders under my bed, and I'm drinking them. I think now is a great time to try cleaning and harvesting my own yeast for the first time ever.

Updates soon.

Great day! Bottled 2 new beers!

Today we made a trip out to Boulder with my mom for a hike, and on the way we stopped at the LHBS and bought...

New Grolsch gaskets!!! Hurray! Actually seeing brand new ones in person really made me feel like a dumb ass for putting any beer in the bottles with the old gaskets. Check em out side by side, see if you can guess which is which.

Yes, I'm a tard.

After I got done replacing all the worn out gaskets I went ahead and bottled two beers; my 2nd hefeweizen (%6.29 ABV) and my first oatmeal stout (6.00% ABV). Both are a little stronger than their respective traditional styles, but they both taste awesome, and in the process I took a ton of pictures for an instructional post on bottling. I should have it up sometime soon.

Well I have to go now. I just spilled Corona on my jeans and have to change my pants.

Awesome beer blog. Thanks Matt!

My buddy Matt sent me a link via THE FACEBOOK SOCIAL NETWORK to his friend's beer blog. Apparently he plans to start a brewery in Pasadena sometime soon. Check it out!


opposite day

It must be opposite day today. This morning I woke to an IPA that is on the verge of exploding because of all the bad ass fermentage that's going on, and an oatmeal stout that might be stuck at 1.040. Usually you don't want to bottle a brew until the gravity has gone under 1.020; if you bottle before, there is the chance that the yeasts will get a second wind in the bottle and your bottles could explode. Anyways, Im a little bit depressed about it.

Queue Charlie Brown sad music...
I need to do some more research to see how I can salvage this! Honestly, most fermentation "issues" on beer forums are responded to by "wait a week," or something to this effect. Hopefully this is the case for me. Anyway, it tastes great ;)

Here's some pictures of the IPA. Amanda woke me up to tell me that "something happened" to my beer. The airlock got clogged with gunk, and since no CO2 could escape, it actually exploded off the top of the bottle!
So I installed a blow off tube, which is basically a plastic tube with one end in my primary and the other in a cup of water/sanitizer. That way, all the crap can get out easily without turning my airlock into a bottle rocket and making a huge mess all over my jug. Again.
Hella fermentage
Anyway, hurray for brewing and hurray for learning stuff! My mom is visiting and we finished all my homebrew last night... so hopefully I can bottle a few of these soon to drink after I get home from tour.



If you decide to use Grolsch bottles, like I did, make sure the gaskets are not worn out. You can buy packs of 100 for around 7 bucks.

Why am I saying this? Because I have already somewhat ruined half of my batch of my favorite beer that I brewed thus far. The gaskets were all worn out and crappy, leaked CO2, and I ended up with 4 16 oz bottles of flat beer. Still drinkable and tasty, but flat!!!

So in short, worn out Grolsch gaskets like THIS:

Equals flat beer like THIS:

O well, lesson learned. I guess that gives me another reason for a sweet LHBS trip! 


Here is my step by step guide to how I brew. There’s a bunch of pics and stuff for you guys to look at, and additional tidbits of information that I have learned in all the research I have done over the last month and a half. I hope its helpful! First and foremost, you have to learn to...


This is a common saying amongst homebrewers haha. I love it. Basically, its extremely hard to frick up your beer. You have to really try. And since this is your first batch, you will probably go overboard in trying to do everything perfectly, which means your beer is going to be fantastic. So don’t worry about it! On a side note, if you have not read the "STUFF YOU NEED TO BREW BEER" or "BABIES FIRST RECIPE..." posts, I highly suggest you do before reading this.


STEP 1- Chill some homebrew!
My Hefeweizen and Blackberry Red Ale (brooklynbrewshop.com)


As you probably know by now, I brew one gallon batches. The standard is 5 gallons.There are a lot of good reasons to brew this way, the main obviously being that it takes much less space. It also forces you to actually BREW more if you want more beer, each batch is cheaper, you get more practice, you can experiment more, and if a batch sucks you won't feel like you wasted all that time and money on 5 gallons of elephant piss (although you should never dump a batch). 

On a side note, if you have not read the "STUFF YOU NEED TO BREW BEER" post, you probably should.
This is my heffeweizen recipe. Its a super straight forward style. You cant frick it up, and the ingredients will run you maybe 8-10 bucks for the first batch since you have to buy hops. The hops will last you 3 or 4 batches! Ive made 2 batches of this, and both are better than any hef I have bought in a store.

-1.2 lb German Wheat Malt
-1.2 lb German Pilsner Malt
-Hops - 60 min boil - Preferably Hallertau, but Liberty is a good substitute. (.2 oz) 4% alpha
-Yeast - Fermentis WB-06 

Primary for 3 weeks, then bottle and let it sit for 2-3 more weeks.


       Here's a list of all the crap you need to brew all grain batches of BEER! A lot of people say you should start with extract brewing. Extract brewing basically takes out the first and most difficult part of the brewing process... this step, called mashing, is really where you will learn the most about how beer works, is the most creative, and in my opinion, is the most fun.

So I just said screw it and jumped into all grain, and I think you guys should too. The first two batches I made are OK and the four I brewed after that are freaking awesome!

Im gonna divide the list of shiz you need into 2 groups. The first is stuff you need to actually brew and get it into the primary fermenter for the first 1-2 weeks, the rest is stuff you need afterward to put it into a bottle. That way you guys don't have to go drop a bunch of money on stuff you wont even use for a few weeks.


Yo. I'm assuming anyone that is reading this already knows me personally. This blog is for you! Or us... whatever way you want to look at it. I want to share my ideas and experiences with brewing beer in my tiny Denver apartment. I also want to help you brew beer in your tiny apartment. AND I want us all to learn from each other to make AWESOME beer in our tiny apartments.

Hopefully this can one day be a place for us to share recipes, and tips/secrets about how we brew our ridiculously great beer. This should also serve as a collective middle finger to the big brewing companies that want to sell us terrible, over priced beer and say that we can't do better ourselves.

So that's my intro post. Im gonna copy and paste my how-to Google doc to this blog.


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